Self Reliant Children? Is it not about being Independent?? Are there any different tools required to be SELF RELIANT??
Well before we dig into the differences and talk about the need of the hour, Letâ€™s find ourselves, with in us.
Most of us or at least people near us are independent in terms of earning bread and butter, taking care of family, cooking food, enabling children with quality education and what not.
But how many times we have dealt independently and successfully with our own setbacks as an adult? We do expect children to Behave all the times but how good we are at managing our own tempers?
Something is yet to be nurtured in us and so definitely an opportunity to construct a SELF RELIANT system for our children.
Self-reliance means being â€œConfident in your own abilities and able to do things for yourself.â€ Expanding on that definition, I see self-reliance as children developing an essential set of life tools:
- Cognitive (e.g., information gathering, analysis,Â decision making);
- Emotional (e.g., regulation of sadness, frustration,Â anger and other negative emotions);
- Behavioral (e.g., studying, working);
- Interpersonal (e.g., social skills,Â teamwork, communication); and
- Practical (e.g., do their laundry, cook meals, manage their finances).
A primary goal of parenting and teaching processes is that of strengthening these areas so that our young generation can take on life with an adequate base of these personal resources and assets.
As a parent we need to understand that children cannot gain Self Reliance on their own. They have neither the perspective nor the experience to develop self-reliance separately.
Instead, we being adults and guardians need to take certain cautious efforts in our parenting which in turn develop confidence and perception in child about all these life tools. Here, I am trying to give you a simple access about how we can imbibe this in our young generation.
- Give your children love and respect which gives them the sense of security and allows to explore and take risks.
- Show confidence in your childrenâ€™s capabilities, thus enabling them to internalize the faith you have in them and develop an enduring sense of competence for themselves.
- Make them realize that they have control over their lives.
- Provide them with guidance and then the freedom to make their own choices and decisions. Donâ€™t forget mistakes is an integral part of learning and must be embraced.
- Show them what their responsibilities are and enable them to be accountable for those.
Young people who believe they are incapable and insignificant and that whatever happens is beyond their control tend to live life by default and reaction. They are generally exceptionally vulnerable sexually, chemically, socially, legally, and/or academically.
However, young people who strongly believe they are capable of initiating learning and change in their lives have significance, and that no matter what circumstances they encounter, they have the capacity within themselves to influence how they respond and live in the face of adversities, usually live by intent and action and are therefore much less vulnerable.
This is all about telling and preparing children for PLAN-B of life i.e. you never fail, you just change the execution plan.